Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Randomize
