my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
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