The maid of honor just puked.
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
Randomize
