Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize
