oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize