These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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