Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
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so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
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