May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
Randomize
