very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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