think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
Randomize
