I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Randomize