My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
I just got carded by a ten year old.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Randomize
