if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
Randomize
