Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
Couch. On fire.
Randomize
