Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
I just threw up in the bathroom next to the zebra exhibit. The kids don't know I skipped a beat. Best nanny, ever.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
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