God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
wanna go halves on a baby?
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
She's the barista slut.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Randomize
