fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
Randomize
