Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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