I think scott just propositioned me for sex
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
