I should be sponsored by Trojan
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
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