Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
Randomize
