butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Randomize
