If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
We were destined to go to rehab together
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
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