Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Randomize
