I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
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