did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
He better not be in your backpack
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
Randomize
