Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
Randomize