you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Randomize
