My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
Randomize
