He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
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