But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
