Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
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