I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
Randomize
