Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
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He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
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I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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