what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
Randomize