I don't think brook has ever known best
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize
