Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
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