well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
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