If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Randomize