Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(586): View more from Michigan

Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?

(313): View more from Michigan

No?

(586): View more from Michigan

Well my cheeks are red now

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(586): Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut? (313): No? (586): Well my cheeks are red now http://tfl.nu/a31l

Replies (3) Good night (723) Bad night (1060)
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(310): View more from California

that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something

(818): View more from California

its my fault though, i'm wearing tights

(310): View more from California

you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap

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(310): that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something (818): its my fault though, i'm wearing tights (310): you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap http://tfl.nu/15rb

Replies (22) Good night (3487) Bad night (852)
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(703): View more from Virginia

If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?

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(703): If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count? http://tfl.nu/wecp

Replies (24) Good night (704) Bad night (3048)
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(905): View more from Toronto

Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language

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(905): Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language http://tfl.nu/v1ob

Replies (17) Good night (4522) Bad night (607)
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(720): View more from Colorado

its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it

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(720): its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it http://tfl.nu/rdim

Replies (15) Good night (1156) Bad night (4722)
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(757): View more from Virginia

im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?

(804): View more from Virginia

who says it cant be both...

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(757): im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever? (804): who says it cant be both... http://tfl.nu/wstu

Replies (50) Good night (6781) Bad night (658)
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(201): View more from New Jersey

so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it

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(201): so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it http://tfl.nu/kytb

Replies (18) Good night (1299) Bad night (4749)
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(713): View more from Texas

she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?

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(713): she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful? http://tfl.nu/75hl

Replies (123) Good night (47463) Bad night (1911)
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(310): View more from California

I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.

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(310): I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila. http://tfl.nu/yi5v

Replies (13) Good night (2098) Bad night (5994)
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(804): View more from Virginia

i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive

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(804): i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive http://tfl.nu/za3r

Replies (1) Good night (2850) Bad night (969)
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(614): View more from Ohio

my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat

(614): View more from Ohio

repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES

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(614): my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat (614): repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES http://tfl.nu/9vr3

Replies (6) Good night (1880) Bad night (676)
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(917): View more from New York City

That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.

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(917): That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies. http://tfl.nu/z8d5

Replies (7) Good night (849) Bad night (310)
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(623): View more from Arizona

Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!

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(623): Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies! http://tfl.nu/zfby

Replies (9) Good night (363) Bad night (597)
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(416): View more from Toronto

Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.

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(416): Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever. http://tfl.nu/quf9

Replies (4) Good night (251) Bad night (516)
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(901): View more from Tennessee

2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.

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(901): 2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares. http://tfl.nu/3b6c

Replies (10) Good night (250) Bad night (534)

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