i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
Randomize