He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
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We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
So, the officer that worked my wreck, I'm rockin his world tonight. He saw me high on morphine in the ER. So he knows my level of crazy. Think he'll agree to wear his gun?
So many things can go wrong tonight.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
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I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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