some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
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