just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize
