whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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