Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
Randomize
