WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
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