what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
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