So drunk, too bad you don't want this
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
Randomize
