Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
He disabled his match.com account in front of me
No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed